Since this is my first review of the new year, we’ll start off with the bad and end with the good. This week our favorite exaggerator Susan has another problem when Jackson was offered an art position back in his hometown, meaning that she would have to move down their, because remember Jackson doesn’t do long distant relationships well. Susan has a bad history with men and she seems to be in the mindset that she’s getting older, so she might not meet any new men, because she seems set to move out of Wisteria Lane. It’s annoying how many problems Susan has had with Mike and Jackson this season, but to be fair, this whole moving with Jackson thing is because Gale Harold is injured. They’re handling his disappearance well, but it’s not clear if they’re simply going to write him out or just leave him in his hometown if he gets better again. The best choice to go would be to write him off, because we simply can’t have Susan not advancing her life. I’ll admit this wasn’t a horrible story, but that simply bored me.

Susan going out with Bob, getting drunk, and then thinking that she slept with him is something that’s been done in almost every show that I can think of. We had to watch as Susan assumes that she slept with him only to hear at the end that they didn’t sleep together. Why didn’t she just ask Bob from the very beginning? Then we could have avoided all the drama, but that’s what Desperate Housewives does, even if they have to go through unnecessary things to get it.

Eva Longoria Parker as Gabrielle Solis

Another plot that confused us was Dave’s vendetta against Mike. It seemed like the plot had advanced to a point where we were finally going to see Dave start making some interesting moves, but instead we saw more of Dave’s deteriorating mental health, which is fine and dandy, but then they through in him and Edie having problems. Edie has basically been non-essential to the show, but the relationship did sort of work. While Dave was definitely showing signs that he was crazy, it was his honesty that finally got him kicked out of the house. After all of the things Dave has done, it feels sort of dumb for the final straw to be that he didn’t tell Edie that his ex-wife died.

Dave’s plot goes up and down and the days where it doesn’t seem like anything major is happening with it is what really makes us not interested. It feels like the show is trying to stall just long enough to use it for the season finale, but unfortunately we might not be that interested when whatever happens finally happens.

Now that Carlos has his eyesight back, things can go back to normal. Gabby would like for Carlos to get a high paying job like he had before he lost his sight, but Carlos has a new lease on life; appreciating everything from a ladybug to a spider. It’s very believable that after losing your sight for five years, that you would appreciate everything that you can see. When a position opens for Carlos, Gabby tries everything to make sure that Carlos gets the job. Carlos doesn’t want it because he wasn’t a very good husband when he worked, but Gabby wants financial security for the family, even though I’m sure this has something to do with those expensive shoes that she brought. The writers have done a good job in making us feel bad for Carlos and Gabby because on one hand Carlos shouldn’t have to take a job that will make him unhappy, but Gabby has sacrificed a lot since he lost his sight, so it’s hard to blame her for wanting more. Gabby and Carlos have been the best couple this season mostly, because their relationship has been pretty consistent.

Bree, who has finally come to accept Andrew’s new relationship, but now has to deal with the mother-in-law. It was fun to have the Hodge resident back to it’s normal self. Alex’s mother seems set on having the boys to herself, by first wanting to do Christmas at her house and then trying to get Andrew and Alex to move down to where she lives. Bree wasn’t going to have it, especially considering that there’s a good chance she could be a grandmother. While Alex’s mother had the upper hand the whole episode, it was Bree who pulled off the finishing move by buying Alex and Andrew a house on Wisteria Lane. While there was nothing major going on at the Hodge resident, it was pleasant considering some of the earlier darker things that were happening between Bree and Orson. It was cool to see the Bree that is overbearing and wants her children to stay close to her.

Last but not least we had the continuing plot of Lynette trying to find Porter while Preston is taking his place. It’s a bit weird that we see so much of Lynette and almost never see Tom, but it works. It was pretty obvious that Preston knew where Porter and Lynette found this out easily. It was surprising to see Porter staying at Lynette’s mom’s place, it was also unnecessary, because this whole plot has taken on somewhat of a serious tone, so it was annoying when all of a sudden the mood turns comedic when we find out where Porter really is. There was a great moment in this episode though when Lynette proves to Preston that she’d be willing to do anything to protect them. A great scene that might get Felicity Huffman an award nomination. It’s only matter of time until Porter is found, but let’s hope it’s soon.

This was simply another slightly above average episode of Desperate Housewives (this isn’t a compliment). While a slightly above average episode might be good, it’s not as good when you take into consideration how much better it could have been. By slowing down certain plots it’s really taking the audience out of them. I wish Desperate Housewives would get back their momentum and keep going. This was a tolerable episode, but hopefully we’ll get that great episode that we’ve been waiting for.

Rating: 7.4

Desperate Housewives is really moving plots along fast this season, because right from the beginning, Lynette learns that Ann is pregnant with Porter’s child. Lynette goes to confront her and Ann’s husband walks in to overhear everything. It turns out that Porter wasn’t joking around when he said that Ann’s husband was a psycho because Lynette comes back to the house to see her husband literally kicking her. It was another disturbing scene and it seemed worse then when Kathryn was getting abused by her husband. At least Lynette isn’t letting her anger about the whole Porter situation interfere with her compassionate side because if she would have left Ann inside the house, it would have been given Lynette a bit of a dark side we don’t want to see.

Gabby comes back home to see Ms. Hildebrand on her couch and back in her life. Apparently Carlos losing his job was only temporary because Carlos announces that he got his job back already and now Ms. Hildebrand has put them in her will. At first it seemed like Hildebrand had some ulterior motives and while she definitely does, they don’t seem as hideous as they were before. She just seems like a old lady who wants a family. Sure she should be trying to make decisions about where the children go, but at least all these decisions do seem to be in the best interest of the children and it is a really good school. It’s also cool to see Gabby stand up for something other then money. It shows that she really does care about her family and that her girls are really important.

James Denton, Dana Delany, Teri Hatcher

Julie comes back with a new boyfriend who is almost the same age as her mother. Sure Susan freaked out, but I don’t think we were. Julie always had to be the adult when it came to her and Susan’s relationship, so her going with an older guy wasn’t that big of a jump. Julie’s cynicism of marriage also isn’t a big jump either; she makes a good point about how it never worked out for Susan. She even makes an even better point about how Mike was the love of Susan’s life and even that didn’t work out.

Bree’s story might have been the weakest storyline out of the bunch again. I’m kind of tired of all these plots involving Bree’s new book. It’s leaving her little time to participate in any personal plots. This all seemed predictable with the hard-as-nails lady wanting to get the dirt on Bree, only to change her tune by the end of the episode.

We finally got to see how psychotic Dave was when Dr. Heller comes to Wisteria Lane. When Dave finds out, he kills him. It was unexpected considering that it was in an open place with lots of people, but that just goes to show you how psychotic Dave is. This episode seemed to confuse us a little about who Dave is going after. On one hand, they tried to keep it a secret by having Dr. Heller not say any names, but then at the end, Dave saves Mike from the fire and tells him that he’s not done with him yet. Does this mean that Mike is his intended target or is he just using Mike to get to his real target?

For now we’ll have to assume that the target is Mike, but the writers have really been weird about this whole thing. It was interesting to see Dave turn out to be the big hero, especially considering he was the one who started the fire in the first place. It was interesting to watch the club burning and seeing who was going to get out and who was going to stay. The show toyed around with us a couple of times during the fire scene by making us believe that Jackson was going to die, then that Mike was going to die and what was up with so many people getting knocked out from the crowd. From what we can see, it looks like all the main characters got out okay, but there are six bodies still left in there. It’ll be interesting to see if any of these six are important characters or just minor characters that we don’t know.

So Porter ended up being arrested for setting the fire, even though there wasn’t really any proof at all. I thought this was a good episode, but it loses points for spoiling the ending in the beginning and the build up to the end wasn’t all that interesting. Now we just have to see what the fall out will be from the fire in the next episode.

Rating: 7.6

It was great; this episode continues from where the last one left off with Tom finding out that Porter is having sex and Lynette seeing Ann leave Tom’s garage. The writers made Tom and Lynette finding out the piece that the other didn’t have fun, with Lynette thinking Tom is cheating and Tom thinking that Lynette knows about Porter’s affair and so relaxed about it. There were some great laugh- out-loud moments here and it’s something that there hasn’t been much of this season.

Lynette took is pretty well aside from the fact that she beat up Ann, but she took it as well as we probably thought she would. We’re not sure if Ann is using Porter or if she truly is in love with him. The writers have done something like this before when Gabby was sleeping with John, but for some reason that was exciting and fun. The Ann and Porter relationship is more depressing and somewhat confusing because we’re not sure what Ann’s ulterior motives are, if there are any.

Bree might have had the most boring plot of the whole episode which involved her and Orson having sex in the kitchen and some boy that they had to fire getting the tape and threatening to post it online. Everything felt forced from the boy being fired in the very beginning right off the bat, and it seemed only to serve as a way for Lynette to find out. What made it a little weird is that Lynette was worried about this getting out, but we weren’t it didn’t seem as bad as Lynette made it out to be. However, Lynette overreacting about the smallest thing definitely fits her character. It’s too bad we didn’t get to see Andrew in action to see exactly how he got the kid to turn over the tape though, because we haven’t seen Andrew in action in quite a while. It wasn’t horrible stuff, but it definitely wasn’t all that interesting.

Gail O’Grady as Anne Schilling, Felicity Huffman as Lynette Scavo

Gabby and Carlos have taken up with Ms. Hildebrand who is being weirdly generous to the family by letting them stay at her house and use her servants. It’s been three days and she already feels like Gabby’s family is her family. You can’t help but feel bad for her though. It’s obvious that she’s just lonely and for the amount of money she was willing to pay Carlos, you would think that Gabby and Carlos would just kind of go along with it. We do admit though that Ms Hildebrand was getting a little out there with the whole having the kids call her Grandma, but she’s an old lady. It’ll be interesting to see how Carlos and Gabby’s life is going to affected after the phone call that Hildebrande made to Carlos’ job. This will put the Solis’ at a much worse place then they were before.

Jackson and Susan embark on their second first date and it’s sort of cute watching them start over and learn new things about each other. The whole no sex rule that Susan comes up with benefits Jackson who apparently is a painter, but had been blocked, and without having sex, he’s finally able to draw again. It’s surprising that Susan didn’t get mad or anything, but kind of cool that she understood; and I’m sure the painting had something to do with it. The Jackson and Susan relationship is solid so far and it’s coming off pretty well, but we’ll have to see how Susan handles it when she finds out that Kathryn and Mike are sleeping together now.

Last but not least we had the McCluskey sisters digging up stuff on Dave, by calling his doctor. The doctor doesn’t divulge any information, but seems really uneasy about where Dave is. This didn’t get a lot of time, so it wasn’t that much of a distraction, but for now, the whole Dave thing isn’t as important as maybe it was a couple of episodes ago.

This episode had all the things that we love about Desperate Housewives. While it had it’s flaws, it’s probably one of the best episodes since the first episode. It also feels like the writers have returned the show more to the sex, lies and secrets type of show, than the watching the adults parent their kids and forcing the kids into scenes. We know the kids are there and it’s good to see that the writers don’t have to keep letting us know that.

This was another good episode and hopefully the rest of the season can go just as well as this episode was.

Rating: 7.8

Susan and Jackson broke up a week ago and Susan wants to get back with him. After talking to her new painter, she goes to visit him but finds another girl in his shower and it turns into a big mess. Susan’s clumsiness and knack for getting in the weirdest situations and finding Jackson’s new girl proves to be one of the most interesting this season. After discovering Jackson’s girl in the shower, I found the storyline going slightly downhill. It wasn’t that anything horrible happened, but it wasn’t given a lot of time and everything felt predictable; You can’t tell me that you didn’t see Jackson walking out the door and then calling her, coming. It seems like for now the relationship is revived, but it just feels like it’s went around in circles, so we’ll see what the writers do to keep it interesting.

Bree has been boring too this season. This episode doesn’t do much to keep our interest in her. It seems that Kathryn is thinking about moving to Maryland with her family because she’s lonely and now that Bree is happy again, there doesn’t seem to be a need for her anymore. Bree sets her up with a client who turns out to be an organ donor and while Kathryn has a night of great sex, she’s not too happy that she just slept with someone who could have taken her kidney. Kathryn going to Maryland might have not been such a bad idea because she’s really been quite useless this season and hasn’t added nothing to the cast but an extra face to put on Wisteria Lane. We’re once again shown the bond between Bree and Kathryn, but that’s been established this season a couple of times now, so at this point we get it. Katherine drinking with Mike is interesting and leads us to think that something between the two might be happening next episode, this is definitely an interesting combination that might prove be interesting within the next episode.

Dave was back in this episode and there wasn’t a lot of time devoted to him and his intentions for someone in particular, but he was interesting in the time that he was given. He’s continuing to be pushy and it looks like Mike is the man who’s life he wants to ruin. At least we know that he wants to kill the man who killed his brother in jail and Mike and Orson are really the only two people who have been in jail on the show, so Mike seems like the obvious choice. It almost seems too easy though to pick Mike as Dave’s target; either that or the writers have just gotten bad at suspense because it’s almost seemed to obvious that Dave is after Mike which leads to believe and hope that there’s a lot more to this story and that Mike isn’t the target.

Felicity Huffman as Lynette Scavo, Gail O’Grady as Anne Schilling

With Mrs. McCluskey on Dave’s tail though, his plan could fall apart and now that McCluskey has her rowdy sister with her. It’s starting to look like Dave’s plan is going to get a little harder. There’s no problem with Mrs. McCluskey having a sister and in fact, that sister who’s played by Lilly Tomlin is kind of interesting, but it feels like there’s a bit of inconsistency being done here. First Mrs. McCluskey has always been alone and the writers along with directors have always given us the impression that she had no family. In fact, I remember several times where some of the characters felt bad for her because she was all alone. It also doesn’t make sense that if McCluskey has a sister who would come any second to help, then why didn’t we see her when McCluskey’s house was torn apart by a tornado. Putting that aside though, it’ll be interesting to see what these two end up doing with their new information on Dave.

Gabby got very interesting this episode and this storyline along with the next one that I’ll talk about is what really reminded me of older episodes of Desperate Housewives where we were intrigued by what was happening and when characters had secrets. While giving a massage, Carlos gives one of his clients an orgasm. I agree it’s a bit weird to tell your wife that you gave some woman an orgasm, but keeping it a secret just makes you look bad. Carlos decides to keep it a secret, but Gabby finds out. When Gabby confronts Mrs. Hildebrandt, Mrs. Hildebrandt talks about how she’s so lonely and that she wasn’t after Carlos. Mrs. Hildebrandt offers Carlos a job that pays $50,000 a month which definitely seems to be the answer to Gabby’s prayers and will get them out of the rut that they’ve been in. Along with that, she offers Gabby and the kids the opportunity to come with her and will pay Gabby in gorgeous dresses which is something that Gabby hasn’t had in quite some time. In the end, it looks like Mrs. Hildebrandt has other plans for Carlos, but we’re not sure what it is.

This is one of those plots that I’m talking about. It doesn’t really feel like we’ve had a plot that lasted longer then one episode and this looks to be an interesting one. It’s always great to see anyone from Six Feet Under anywhere and Frances Conroy is such a great actor that it’s a pleasure to have her on the show and I can’t wait to see what Mrs. Hildebrandt has in store for Carlos.

The best storyline of the episode involved the Scalvo’s. Lot’s of things seem to be on with the Scalvo family. Tom is still going through his little mid-life crisis and Lynette thinks that Tom is having an affair. Tom having an affair is silly, not impossible, but silly. He’s consistently one of the best guys on the shows and it just would have been crappy if he had really been cheating. The woman that Lynette accused Tom of sleeping with though is actually sleeping with Porter. I have to say I feel a bit disturbed, especially considering that just last season Porter was a 12 year old chubby kid and now he’s running around sleeping with older women. It makes for some interesting TV though and it was definitely the best storyline this episode.

So Desperate Housewives wasn’t quite perfect, but it showed improvement and hopefully things get better from here.

Rating: 7.2

In present day, Gabby thinks she’s pregnant. During the five years we see how Gabby found out she was pregnant the first two times unexpectedly. I had forgotten that Gabby was deemed unable to carry children after she took the tumble down the stairs some seasons ago, so it is quite surprising that she was able to have one, not to mention another child. After the second child was born, Gabby asks Carlos to get a vasectomy, something that Carlos tells Gabby that he did, but didn’t actually.
The vasectomy storyline has been done in almost every family sitcom and it’s tired even in this episode. It almost feels like he’s trying to trap Gabby and we all know that Gabby never planned to have any kids. That brings us to another point: we really haven’t seen how Gabby is as a parent; sure we’ve seen her drive them where they need to go and she obviously takes care of them based oon how tired she looks and her crappy hair, but we have seen a real connection with her children. Actually, to a degree it almost seems as if Gabby wishes she wouldn’t have even had her kids, unlike Lynette who was always tired and stressed out, but you could tell she loved her kids. At least the writers kept Juanita to a minimum, even though why not have the other kid talk to Gabby instead.

Tom is talking about getting an RV and taking the kids out of school to drive around and see the world. During the five years, Tom had a heart attack which drove him to somewhat have a crisis of wanting to see more and do more, which drove him to buying the car. The problem is that it seems a bit selfish for Tom to think that he can do this when his own wife survived cancer and wasn’t like that. Tom has always been the most sensitive husband on the street, but it just feels a bit odd to hear Tom talking about changing his family’s life just so he can see the world.

Neal McDonough as Dave Williams, Nicollette Sheridan as Edie Britt, Teri Hatcher as Susan Mayer

Bree is starting to rethink hiring Orson to become her partner, because she doesn’t want it to affect her relationship with Katherine. After Orson left for jail, Bree started drinking again and Katherine moved in with her and helped her focus on business instead becoming an alcoholic again. Bree perhaps had the most realistic five years out of the housewives, because Bree is a character that has to have order in her life and with Benjamin going back with his mom and Orson going off to jail, it seems very likely for Bree to go back to her old ways.

Susan’s flashback didn’t tell us anything we didn’t know. It just showed us how the divorce proceedings went. Susan’s life in present day was a lot more interesting with Jackson wanting to take their relationship to the next level by moving in, but it’s obvious that Susan doesn’t, because she possibly still has feelings for Mike. This relationship was somewhat doomed since the beginning, because it’s been apparent that Susan has had feelings for Mike since the beginning of the season. Jackson was actually a likeable guy, so it’s sad to see him leaving. Hopefully he’s not gone for good though and the writers will incorporate him into the show even though he’s not with Susan.

I guess the main event was supposed to be the ending with everyone planning Mrs. McClusky’s birthday party. We saw as Dave set the whole thing up and moved things around in her house and when Mrs. McClusky came to the party, she went ballistic and everyone went crazy. Dave got her out of the way and it was funny how sincere Dave seemed at hoping McClusky takes care of herself.

I have to say that this episode was disappointing. It was almost a different take on the recapping the season episode, instead it recapped the last five seasons.

All the couples seemed to have problems at the beginning of the episode, but somehow they’re all solved by reminiscing about the last five years. It felt very weird to have all these issues resolved so fast without much time for them in present day. Desperate Housewives seems to have a problem that other shows have and it’s the lack of stretched out storylines. A plot can drag on for too long, but plots that take up more then two episodes are needed. Aside from Dave’s agenda, it feels like every episode is just starting new.

Now we know Dave is after a guy on Wisteria Lane, but it’s impossible to really peg who it is. The most obvious choice I feel is Mike, but that seems too obvious, especially considering Mike was targeted by Orson, run-down with a car and had amnesia. It just feels like it would be an overkill for the target to be Mike. I’m hoping that the reveal of who it is happens sooner then later though and they don’t try to drag it out for too much longer.

Rating: 6.5

Gabby and Carlos haven’t had any time to themselves since the kids came along. So Gabby’s new idea to get this time is pushing Juanita into going to a play date for two hours. Things don’t go so well when Juanita catches her parents in the act. Gabby makes up some excuse about daddy wrestling with mommy, but they eventually decide to tell Juanita all about sex. Juanita goes around telling the kids in the neighborhood eventually squashing anymore time for Gabby and Carlos to have any time.

First off, I have to say that it’s been a long time since I’ve hated a child in a show. Juanita is starting to get more and more annoying every time she’s shown this season. The writers seem keen on trying to shove her down our throats and it’s not working. Gabby has two children by the way and the only line we get from the other one is “sperm” and that wasn’t funny either.

Mike gets jealous when MJ draws a picture and it has Mike in the background of the picture and Jackson in front. To get some cool points, Mike buys MJ a bike, a bike that Mike was hoping to teach MJ to ride, but Jackson beats him to the punch. When Susan finds out about Jackson teaching MJ to ride, she tries to get MJ to play along like he didn’t know how to ride his bike, even encouraging the poor kid to fall a couple of time to put on a show.

For some reason, parents on this show keep trusting their kids to keep secrets. They should have learned by now that kids will almost always rat you out. MJ is a cute kid and a lot easier to take in then Juanita, but there’s something zombie-like about him. MJ needs some of the attitude that Juanita has, because she has too much.

Felicity Huffman as Lynette Scavo and Charlie Babcock as Stu

Mike’s time away from Wisteria comes to an end when he moves in across the street into Mary Alice’s old house which surprisingly still hasn’t sold in five years, but I guess that’s what the economy is like nowadays. How did Mike afford his place you say? Well that’s due to the neighborhood anger management patient Dave. Dave’s anger finally showed itself when he snaps at Edie, but with the anger, came his great manipulation techniques; He wanted Mike to join the band so badly that he bought Mary Alice’s house and is giving Mike a cheap price on the rent. Dave is one of the highlights this season and the background on his character is developing slowly, but still remains interesting.

Lynette is definitely suffering the most out of all the housewives this season. She’s now a highly successful business woman with her new cooking franchise, but her family is starting to fall apart. Lynette finds out that Orson got fired from his job three weeks ago and has been lying about it. Apparently, Lynette forgives easily now, because not only did she shrug off his deceit, but she seems unphased by the disturbing scene a couple of episodes ago where Orson forced her to cook a roast. Then she sacrifices her partnership with Katherine to hire Orson. The Hodge/ Van De Kamp household is a weird one now; I don’t get how Bree can take so much from Orson and still want to be with him. One of Bree’s strong suits was that she didn’t take any crap, but she’s taking a lot of Orson’s this season; what seemed to be a match made in heaven is quickly turning into a boring affair.

Bree’s woman of the year ceremony didn’t go well either when Lynette gets herself hammered. This episode brought Lynette yearning to want to go back to work to the forefront. Lynette has always wanted to work and with the kids mostly in school, she’s finding she has a lot more time on her hands. She tried her skills out with re-marketing Bree’s magazine ad, but that didn’t go so well.

This episode was supposed to be about jealousy and at first it seemed like the housewives were jealous of Bree’s new found success, but by the end of the episode it’s clear that Bree is jealous of the life that her friends still get to lead. Bree was always the best at one thing and that was running a household, the new business woman Bree is definitely not as fun as the old Bree.

Desperate Housewives is missing the fun that was in seasons before. There were very few times this episode and the past few where I genuinely laugh. There really seems to be a serious tone resonating this season and it’s not enjoyable. We’d also like to see less of the kids and more of what’s going on with the adults. I also still don’t see the bond between the housewives that they once had, This episode made it obvious that they’re all friends, but the same chemistry that they all had has been somewhat diminished. This episode was a weak one and it didn’t feel like it advanced anything forward. It actually seemed like a bit of a waste. This episode is watchable, but it highlights a lot of the shortcoming’s that is plaguing this season; we’ll just have to see if Desperate Housewives can overcome them.

Rating: 6.3

Maybe it’s just me, but I don’t remember Desperate Housewives dealing with so many frivolous problems amongst the characters themselves. We’ve had some serious storylines like teen pregnancy, murder (of course), and cheating. All of the seriousness seems to have taken a detour from this season, maybe it’s due to the writers saying hey we’ve been there done that, but without anything serious, the show is starting to feel like some sort of a sitcom to a degree.

Gabrielle’s life has really taken a turn this season and we find out exactly how far when we see that the Solis’s have to sell their car to pay the mortgage. I don’t know how they’ve gone through all the drug money that they got at the end of last season, but apparently they didn’t invest it very well. When they sell their car, they buy a new one from the newly successful Andrew. It seemed like Andrew had turned over a new leaf and wasn’t his old evil self anymore, which is true, but apparently he still has a little of the evilness left in him as he sells them a car that has its fair share of problems and when the radiator goes bad, he refuses to pay for it himself. It’s nice to see that there is still an evil side to little Andrew, even if it’s not as out there as before.

Susan’s son MJ, who is probably the cutest kid on the show, is having problems with a bully and won’t tell anyone who the bully is. Susan found it surprising that MJ didn’t want to talk to her about the whole bullying thing, but it’s not all that surprising. Most boys want to talk to their dads about these types of things. Susan and Mike find out that it’s Gabby’s daughter, Juanita who’s the bully. The moment that MJ didn’t want to tell anyone who was doing the bullying I think we could all put it together that it was Juanita. I can see why the writers gave Gabby Juanita as a daughter, because she’s technically everything that Gabby isn’t, but Juanita doesn’t really bring anything to the show… well, nothing good at least. It looks like next week, Juanita is going to be involved in another mishap with Gabby and it’s just unfortunate that it feels like she’s getting too much time.

It’s quite sad that Susan and Gabby don’t handle it very well; more Susan then Gabby though. Gabby seems to encourage Juanita’s behavior and Susan makes the mistake of letting herself get drawn in also. The best cause of action probably would have been letting the kids work it out themselves and why is it that we never get to see Gabby and Carlos’s other daughter?

Teri Hatcher as Susan and Mason Vale Cotton as MJ

Bree probably had the most interesting storyline which had Danielle come back, bringing the now six year old Benjamin. Things have changed with Danielle, she’s married, Jewish, and a vegetarian, all things that Bree doesn’t accept. It’s been three years since the last time they saw Danielle and it’s taken them a lot of time to just get them down here. Bree is usually the smartest and most rational housewife in the bunch, so why wouldn’t she know that giving meat to a vegetarian child would have a bad reaction. Sure we know Bree is traditional, but it felt out of character for her to do something stupid like this. You can’t disagree with Bree though about Danielle home schooling him, because she was definitely not the best student. Danielle having Benjamin call her by her first name does show the disconnection that Danielle has with her son and the question is brought up this episode whether Danielle really even wants Benjamin or if she’s just trying to punish her mother. This was just another problem to add to Orson’s and Bree’s troublesome relationship this season too.

Then we had Edie’s new husband Dave, who seems to be charming the pants off of everyone except Mrs. McClusky. Her not so subtle attempts at trying to get information on Dave were horrible to watch because she was so obvious about what she was trying to do. Edie realizes that she doesn’t know anything about Dave either and it was sort of interesting to see her push him about where he went to school. Dave isn’t stupid though and manages to come up with the best story about having to support his family making her prying seem kind of foolish. The best thing about Dave in this episode was the way he was able to manipulate Lynette into letting Tom play his bass guitar. This was one of those times where you rooted for Dave because Lynette was being a pain to Tom about what he hasn’t been able to do. Dave seems to know how to push the right buttons on everyone though and if you can pull one on Lynette, then you’re good.

It was almost scary at the end when Dave realizes that it’s Mrs. McClusky who’s looking up his background and talking about her having dementia seems to foreshadow that there might be more in store for Mrs. McClusky than she knows.

This was okay, but most of the situations in this episode didn’t feel important and there felt like some plots didn’t get enough time when they should have like it would have been nice to see more Danielle, when this could be her last time on this season. It was cool to see Susan and Gabby together drinking, but the bond between all of them has really been lost.

This episode had its moments, but it wasn’t anything special. I want to see the situations be bigger and not as petty as bullying. It feels like there’s too much comedic stuff and not enough of the danger or suspense that we’ve had in previous seasons. Things are going to have to change on Desperate Housewives. The show has done a good job of recreating this world five years later, but now it’s time to fill this world five years later with some new drama and not the stuff we got in this episode.

Rating: 6.5

It’s odd how this season the housewives of Wisteria Lane are more apart then ever. We still haven’t seen too many scenes where the housewives are together or doing anything. The relationship between the women has become lost so far this season and one of the best things about this show was the friendships and pacts between them all.

We were introduced to Susan’s new man last week and this week Susan’s new man was introduced to Mike. Things seem to really be over between Mike and Susan, because Mike took Susan’s new boyfriend pretty well… In fact maybe a bit too well, once Mike meets Jackson he wants to get to know him, just so he can get to know the guy who Susan might expose to MJ and they hit off very well. When Jackson comes home though, Susan realizes that he’s using new techniques in the bedroom and realizes that Mike was the one who told them. It freaks her out and she doesn’t want Jackson and Mike to start hanging out as pals.

Things between Susan and Mike must have really been bad at one point, because Susan doesn’t think that Mike views her in a good light, but it’s obvious that Mike still does love Susan, and you could just see it in his face after Susan left the bar that he wishes that they were together. It’s somewhat clear that Susan feels the same way and it’s probably the reason why Susan doesn’t want to introduce Jackson to her kid. We also saw Karl come back in a cameo this episode, and apparently he just stops by. Karl is still the same Karl and it’s funny that they’ve now been divorced for almost seven years. It seems like the old Susan and Mike storyline will be back this season; If the two do find there way back to each other, let’s hope they stay together this time.

The theme surrounding Lynette this season is balancing her home life with her new life as a media darling. Orson was in a bad mood most of this episode, first with the fact that Bree is using the name Van De Kamp instead of Hodge. Her reason is that it just sounds better and I agree. Through the whole episode Bree keeps promising to make this pot roast for Orson, but when she’s held up at a catering event she comes home to see him sitting at the table, demanding his pot roast, because she promised. This might have been one of the saddest scenes ever on Desperate Housewives, watching her cook the pot roast and crying, you could help, but feel a sense that this was some kind of abuse from Orson.

Gabby tried to make her reentry into society by crashing a party she was dis-invited to, because Carlos is now working at the country club, and you don’t want to be seen talking to the help. Carlos’ new occupation of “rubbing members” is a bit from left-field. Where did it exactly come from? It seems like something very uncharacteristic of Carlos, but the Carlos that we have this season is very different from the one we knew five years ago and for the better. He seems much happier then he did before, unfortunately Gabby doesn’t feel that way. Unlike Carlos, she loved the lifestyle they used to live and it doesn’t seem like she’ll stop til she achieves it.

Lynette’s two sons seem to be taking up all her time this season. When she finds out that a classmate of Porter’s was kicked out of school for selling drugs, she thinks that Porter might have been friends with the kid meaning that Porter might be into selling drugs also. She goes on a social networking site (something along the lines of MySpace) and pretends to be a girl that goes to his school. After finding out that Porter isn’t friends with the kid, she continues her charade to find out more about Porter. She finds out he likes poetry, but things take a turn to the more disturbing side when Porter falls in love with her online. When she realizes that she’s the object of her son’s affection, she gets to work on writing the greatest break-up letter ever devised (or so we’re told) except she sends it signed “Mom”. Poor Lynette. She almost got away with it too. The sad part about it all was that not only did Lynette enjoy there conversations, so did Porter, but of course he won’t admit that to his mother.

Lynette’s journey with raising her boys without being too over protective is something that’s a lot more fun to watch. While season’s before she’s always tried to be the best mother that she could, it was easier back then. Now that the kids are older, she’s realizing that the time when the kids wanted to be with her are now over and it seems like it’s harder to let go. Kudos to the show for showing Parker, maybe we’ll see Penny next week.

The overall plot seems to be Edie’s new husband. We were suspicious of him last episode, but he gets even weirder this episode when Edie comes home and she’s sad about a comment that Miss McClusky made about her boobs. He goes over to McClusky and asks her to apologize, but the old bat refuses. Soon her cat goes missing and it’s obvious that he had something to do with taking it, when she apologizes to Edie and finds her cat back in her house, she starts to figure it out too. Even Edie is slowly and I mean slowly starting to see that there might be something up with this guy. Edie’s husband is a strange one and very intimidating to have the show. His run in with McClusky proved to be interesting, so it should be fun to see how he gets along with his other neighbors on Wisteria Lane.

This was another good episode which had some interesting plots. The storyline about Edie’s husband seem like it’s going to be dragged through out the whole season which would could end up getting rather stale, but overall this episode was nothing great, but a satisfying one indeed.

Rating: 7.5

This episode mostly served as a way to introduce us to the characters five years later. Yeah, sure we knew them five years ago, but things have changed, but then again some things are still the same. The least changed person is Lynette who is now raising the twins, but they’re much older. It’s a bit sad to see the two young boys who played the twins since first season not be there anymore, because they did such a good job. The twins are older, but they’re still as bad as ever. The writer’s do a great job of making us believe that this is how the boys have turned out. The only thing fairly odd is that the oldest son wasn’t mentioned this episode and the baby girl, and Kayla weren’t even mentioned, but maybe they’ll come up later on this season.

Lynette is still the same old Lynette, only instead of being a housewife; she’s put her house working skills to open up a catering business with Katherine. It was sad to see that her daughter came back to take the baby and with no one to take care of she basically treats the business like her baby.

Nicollette Sheridan as Edie Britt

Gabby is now a mom of two girls and she’s no longer the pretty high maintenance Gabrielle we’re used too. In fact, she’s really let herself go, while Carlos has let his hair and beard go gray. Gabby definitely has one of the biggest changes of the show and it’s neat to see a complete opposite the Gabby we’re used to seeing. Gabby is outshined by one other person though…

Susan is probably the most changed on the show out of the housewives. Over the last five years she and Mike got into a car crash where a mom and her baby were killed. This caused friction in the relationship, mostly due to the fact that Susan couldn’t get over it and kept blaming Mike for it, when in reality it was really because some jerk knocked a stop sign down. Susan is now sleeping with her painter, which is something the old Susan would have never done and she’s hiding it from her friends which is also something that Susan wouldn’t usually do. It’s not just the plot changes for Susan that makes her different, but it’s the character herself, who really seems to have come into her own sexuality this season. Plus it helps that Susan probably looks better this season then in any other season and with Gabby looking mommy-fied, she’s all we have.

Even though we’re five years in the future, the drama is still just as bad as ever. Lynette is still having trouble taming her two sons and trying to teach them how to grow up to be men. Lynette and Tom have the best relationship on the show. It was great to see the two come together again to teach the boys a lesson.

Edie comes back with a husband that never went out with any of the other ladies of Wisteria Lane. Her new husband is something to watch for and it’s obvious that he has a dirty secret, which is sad, because with him around Edie seems to be a changed woman or she’s at least trying. Edie’s meeting with Gabby was classic Edie and it was funny.

Lynette’s problem this episode is that she’s became the face of the business, while Katherine is doing most of the work back at the shop. Katherine doesn’t feel like Lynette is giving her any credit and rightfully so. Katherine and Lynette are another pairing that the writers have done a great job with. The two are friends, but they’re so much alike, that everything turns into a competition and they really know how to push each others button. Katherine get Lynette back in a good way and it’s pretty funny watching the two go at it. Plus it’s great to see Andrew; hopefully we see Julie and Danielle make appearances too.

Desperate Housewives is back this season and it’s definitely giving shows this season a run for its money. It took a gamble this season and if this episode is any indicator it looks like it might possibly pay off. After five years Wisteria Lane is still interesting and it looks like it’ll be getting just as crazy this season.

Rating: 9.5